Addickted

Director / Photographer / Editor: Ning Zhou

Executive Consultant: Angelina Merkulova

Cast: Ning Zhou, Ivan Vahos Arenas, Angelina Merkulova, Lamp Lee

Associate Director of Photography: Angelina Merkulova

Music Composer: Ning Zhou

I was born in the winter of 1996. Because all the male in my family were born in December or January, they took for granted that I would also be a boy.

In the 1990s of China, the concept of "boys dominating over girls" still affected many people of my mother’s age. Superstitious women would even use unbelievable means such as worshiping the gods, drinking mysterious Chinese herbs while they were pregnant in order to give birth to a boy. All those, just because "Girls need to be protected", "Girls will eventually marry to another family", "Children the female will give birth to will not follow her family name" ...

 

"Giving birth to a girl makes a woman not good enough."

When I was born as a girl, my mother developed an inferiority complex. One day when I was a child, she suddenly told me: "Actually, when I gave birth to you, you were a boy. But later you lost your own sparrow while playing in a park.” (Sparrow means Dick in my hometown dialect.)

 

I was confused and tried to find evidence that I was a boy from my childhood photos. Unfortunately, in all the infant photos I have, my lower body was hidden, so I have no way of knowing the truth about my gender. In many childhood pictures, I looked like a very confused child, always looking for something.

 

I decide to find my dick.